Bilbo Baggins

The last time we were in Italy at a restaurant the English translation of the menu read things like 'Stripes of chickens chest' and 'Scallops' that were not actual scallops but rather veal. It's what I ordered of coarse. my mouth watering for scallops. I love the Italians and how they translate English.
This time in Italy the restaurant we visited was a bit different, including the company. Let me explain.

Christoph and I were sent from the Gruener company to go on a 2 day tour of the Giorgetti Italian furniture in one of most beautiful places in Italy....Lake Como. Did you know that the people of Como are so nonchalant, that when Brad Pit and Angelina Jolie visited they could have cared less of who they were. George Clooney has a Penthouse there because he likes to be treated like a normal person. One time his motorcycle broke down, so he went to a repair guy by where he lives. The guy let him in, and didn't have a clue who he was. The repair guys daughter eventually came in and dropping here jaw knew exactly who he was. He plays basketball with his Italian friends in a special spot up until the paparazzi got hold of it. I was told all of this by our Italian entourage from Giorgetti sitting on the lake for a fancy dinner, thinking he was George's best friend or something. I asked him how he knew all of this, and in his Italian bouncing flare he answered. "Wella youa knowa, the newspaper, anda the worda justa get a rounda." There was about 7 Germans total, all male have you and me, one little pregnant American girl who had no clue up until now what Giorgetti produced and how they produced it. I found it very interesting, not just learning about the furniture going through the production factories, but also being the only woman there among older business German men who all were so happy I was having a baby. It's funny, once people know you are pregnant they treat you completely different. It's like I could do or say whatever I wanted and they wouldn't care less because after all..."She's pregnant." I could fart as loud as I want and no one would care. I could start swearing uncontrollably and they would just say..."How are you felling? Ok?"

We were picked up by a large van that contained three of the men we would be seeing the tour with and later we would meet up with the lot. There was one particular guy that CHristoph and I didn't quite understand. His last name was Mutta which means 'mother' in German. He was a doctor, so we called him Doctor Mutta. Completely translated it means "doctor mother." Sounds like a swear word to me. He was a strange little man, grey hair with a white fluffy frame around his face. I finally after two hours of studying him came to the conclusion he was the spitting image of Bilbo Baggins. That about sums up his physical appearance. As for his mannerisms. He sat in the back of the van and said a total of about 4 words the entire 4 hour trip. That's about one word per hour. We drove by a strawberry stand and he yells out, "Strawberries!" The next stop of coarse he found himself a fruit stand and bought himself a bag full of different fruits which would later cause him more stress than good. Every time we got in and out of the van he came running and yelling. "My fruit! Don't sit on my fruit!" Now if we were to actually sit on his fruit we would have to be a couple of things. 1) blind 2) stupid 3)downright mean. Now, thinking of normal business doctor men, you would think they would be a bit prestigious, usually ellude that if they don't know everything they are certainly close. Well, not this guy. He was....well a hobbit to be quite descriptive. We would neither say much nor do much other than scurry from furniture piece to furniture piece, touching, sitting, smelling, smiling. I swear if he took off his shoes we would be sure to behold a hairy forest of hobbit feet. Extraordinary those hobbits.

Now on to the tour. From the beginning I was always curious of how exactly people make furniture. Now I know and find it absolutely wonderful how a small piece of maple, tropical, oak, cherry, olive wood can after many stages be transformed into a beautiful piece of furniture. This particular company strives for a classic ritzy antique who cater mostly to VERY well to do people (A dining table running you to up to 30,000 Euro) in areas such as Russia and Africa. A small but good percent attracts the Germans as well as many other countries. Giorgetti himself is a very Italian man who looks and sounds like he came straight from the Godfather. His son even got killed by the Italian mob! I could of met him but right as I went in the ladies room, he walked by and of coarse Christoph got to nod his head at him. Stupid bladder. He is the Godfather in the furniture world.
9:00 in the evening rolled around and finally we were on our way to dinner. I was starving. We were taken to a fantastic restaurant on the lake, where we had great conversation, mostly with the Italians because the German guys didn't have much to say. Italians always have something to say which I find absolutely wonderful. Finally our night ended at 12 with yet another dessert after about 2 and we were off to our hotel room. The next day was completely the same, included with tours and lunch.

There's something about Italy, something in the air that makes everything seem like it's gonna be ok. My experiences there have always been wonderful and surrounded with wonderful people. It was truly an experience to remember. I love Italy.

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