Indecisive

Indecisive. This is all I have been lately....and a bit crazy. Poor Christoph can't catch a break in between me asking if he will still love if I lost all my hair or gained 100 pounds, to me crying about how I am doing the very opposite of losing weight before my wedding. I just can't get enough popcorn, or delicious garlic butter sauteed scallops dipped in more butter, with a side of butter. As much as I LOVE cooking, I need to quit tempting myself with cooking my absolute favorite things! And dipping those favorite things in butter. Oh how I love butter.

Wedding preparations are honestly the first, and last thing on my mind. It comes up first, then it gets pushed to last, then it stresses me out. I really don't have too much preparation besides inviting more people, even though we have reached the limit, making my mothers old wedding dress into the dress of my dreams, and....actually I have a lot to do.

Now, to be honest I have never been one of those girls who has dreamed of their weddings, and planned it all out even before they have a boyfriend. Well, maybe in some cases. But still, I could have done with a wedding planner. For example, on my beautiful day, knowing how I am going to decorate my reception place, shower, do my hair, breath, flowers, food, is really beyond me. I've heard these things all fall into place, and the wedding will still go on.....I guess I have to see it to believe it. But! I can honestly say, I am enjoying myself. Having my mom look at me in her old dress, as we work together to make it my own makes me so happy. Knowing that a wonderful godly man wants to take care of me for the rest of my life. Figuring out what song I will dance to with my dad. My dad crying when I play the song for him. My parents coming along side of us, and praying for us when we are struggling. Christoph's parents having patience for a silly American girl who can't make up her mind. Friends who are praying and loving on both of us. These are the things that I will cherish and remember for the rest of my life. Not what color the table clothes should be.

I think the best thing about your wedding day, is that in a few uttered words you are no longer two but one, and it takes three to make it happen. How divine is that.